We all have different standards for what we want or expect in a significant other.

Before I was in a committed relationship, I fantasized about being with a guy who made me laugh, enjoyed similar music and liked the same television shows I did. Now mind you, when I had this blue print of a romantic partner, I was fourteen years old. A year later, I found a mismatch of my ideal partner in my best friend and surprisingly, he gave me the type of affection I would have never expected from my first love and that’s why we are still together seven years later – and engaged.

Now, maybe I’m old fashioned, but it seems like people my age look for similar characteristics in a partner that I dreamed about when I was fourteen.


Surprisingly, these “relationship goals” memes do not portray over-the-top displays of affection: room filled with roses, a proposal on top of the Empire State Building, a brand new car or outfit.

These “relationship goals” that are recycled on a weekly-basis thanks to my Twitter and Facebook feed are as follows:

When did standards get as low as If he/she sings my favorite song, he/she is bae? 

Aren’t you supposed to be with someone who has the same interests as you? Maybe they enjoy the same song as you and that’s what sparks your first conversation before you even start dating? WOW! What a concept! Communication!

Singing the same song in your boyfriend’s Toyota isn’t going to decipher if he is the “one.”

Try paying bills, living together and dealing with each other after a shitty day at work. Now, that’s real. Sitting in your boyfriend’s car singing to the Pitch Perfect soundtrack does not make you two marriage material.

I can’t help but notice that no matter how many times this #RelationshipGoal is shared, it gets more and more likes on Social Media.

Oh, the lovely fight for the death for Likes! It appears that some couples prefer more “Likes” from their close friends than they do from each other. Just because you get a lot of attention on Social Media – taking video of singing in the car or hugging in the rain – doesn’t necessarily mean you are an actual #RelationshipGoal.

What’s going on when you two aren’t nose-deep in your phone, refreshing your Facebook, anticipating notifications? Are you two actually communicating? Do you have plans outside of your next planned/candid (but actually planned) Facebook post?

I’m not saying you should be spamming your friends’ newsfeed with intimate details about the ups and downs of your relationship, because that is no one’s business; but understand that just because there is a trend on Social Media, it doesn’t mean it is healthy or needed in your own relationship.

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